Moving, two ways.

Soon, you'll notice that the background of my photos has changed.
I've moved back to Buffalo, back into the on-campus student apartment that I share with three other girls.
And I'm having some majorly mixed feelings about that.

I moved in today, and the second I walked in everything felt different.  And not in a good way. 
Don't get me wrong, now.  Aspects of a new setup in the living room and kitchen are great - there's more storage space and more light.  There are new equipment additions to the kitchen, which is always a plus.  And the new shower curtain in the bathroom I share with our newest roommate is pretty.  I appreciate pretty things.
But at the same time, so many things had changed while I was gone, and it just didn't feel like home anymore.

Now, I guarantee part of this emotional rollercoaster can be attributed to the fact that today was my first Sunday away from my VA church home.  And I visited my fiancé at his new townhouse, where we'll be spending our first month and a half or so of our married life, as soon as I got back to the Buffalo area, and that truly felt like home.  But, I don't live there.  And I couldn't bring my church up to Western New York with me.  So there's two homes that I can't have right now.

I think, ultimately, I'm longing for a sense of permanence.  The college lifestyle of living between two places, taking enough classes to fill up two more semesters, and the nine remaining months before my wedding - it's all just temporary, and it's wearing on me.  A permanent home and church community is what I want most in the world right now.

I really want my apartment to feel like home, however temporary a solution it is.  Once all my roommates get back, I hope it will.  Till then, I just need to lean on God and trust that He knows better than I do about waiting.

So...any tips for patience?

On a side note, my heart was majorly touched to see the incredible response to Jennifer Perillo's call this past Friday.  I can't even imagine how hard it would be to lose someone you loved so much so suddenly, and the flood of support that went her way in the form of peanut butter pies everywhere was absolutely heartwarming.  It was wonderful to witness the comradery in the blogging community - just proves you don't have to meet someone in person to love them!  Sadly, because I was packing to move, I was unable to participate.  The Derby Pie was the best I could do, but I've been lifting Jennie and her family up in prayer ever since I read her post, and I hope you'll do the same.

"Derby" Chocolate Bourbon Pecan Pie

While I wish I was posting a Peanut Butter Pie for Jennie today in honor of her husband, this will have to do.  Please join me in sending prayers for her and her family her way, and take a look around the blogosphere to see everyone who's honoring Mikey's memory today.
This, ladies and gents, is my first pie.  My very first pie that I made all by myself.
You can picture my proud-and-accomplished face here.

This pie was my contribution to a "Throwdown" between me and my friend Jim - who hopefully will be guest-posting his chicken thigh recipe soon!  This basically just meant that he cooked dinner, I made dessert, and our friends and family consumed and greatly enjoyed them!  This Throwdown was also followed by the most epic game of Apples to Apples I've ever played.  I think everyone won :)

One of our favorite desserts at a restaurant near our place in WV is called a Kentucky Derby - it's a cross between a chocolate chip cookie and a pecan pie, served warm with whipped cream and hot fudge.  It's insanely delicious.
When I found a version of the Derby on She's Becoming Doughmesstic (one of my favorite blogs, and another VA girl!), naturally, it was the first pie I wanted to try to make.  I mean, warm chocolate pecan cookie pie?  What's not to love?

Of course, we had to kick up the decadence too - we topped the gooey pie with vanilla bean ice cream, homemade hot fudge (recipe coming soon!), caramel syrup, and freshly whipped cream.  It was positively dreamy.  I can see this recipe being made and enjoyed over and over again in the future.

Those slices disappeared SO quickly.

And now I want more pie.

"Derby" Chocolate Bourbon Pecan Pie

Source: crust from How to Cook Everything, filling adapted from She's Becoming Doughmesstic

For the deep-dish pie crust:

1-1/2 cups all-purpose flour

3/4 tsp salt

1-1/2 tsp sugar

10 tbsp cold unsalted butter, cut into small pieces
1/4 cup ice water, plus more if necessary

Directions:

In a large bowl, mix together the flour, salt, and sugar until combined.  With a pastry blender, cut in the butter in two stages - 6 tbsp until some pieces the size of peas remain, then the remaining 4 tbsp - until the mixture looks like cornmeal.  Add the ice water and mix with your hands until you can form the dough into a ball, adding another tablespoon or two of water if necessary.  If you overdo it and the dough becomes sodden, just add a bit more flour.  Form the dough into a disk, wrap in plastic wrap, and freeze for 10 minutes or refrigerate for at least 30 before rolling it out.

To roll out, place the dough on a floured surface and sprinkle the top of the dough with flour.  Use a rolling pin to roll with light pressure out from the center into a circle, using ragged edges to repair any tears.  Once the diameter of the dough is about 2 inches greater than that of your pie plate, fold the dough in half, gently transfer halfway onto the pie plate, and unfold to settle into the plate.  Trim the edges of the dough to 1 inch over the edge, fold it underneath itself around the edge of the plate, and flute the crust with your preferred method.  Freeze for 10 minutes or refrigerate for 30 before filling.

For the filling:

1 cup plus 2 tbsp sugar

1/2 cup all-purpose flour

2 eggs, beaten

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, melted

1 cup pecans, chopped (I used 1/2 cup coarsely chopped and 1/2 cup finely chopped)

1/3 cup bittersweet chocolate chips

1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips

1/3 cup milk chocolate chips

1 tbsp vanilla (I use Nielsen Massey Madagascar Bourbon Vanilla)

2 tbsp Kentucky bourbon

Center a rack in the oven and preheat the oven to 350˚F

Combine sugar and flour in a large bowl, then add the beaten eggs - the mixture will be thick and pale yellow.  Pour over melted butter and stir to combine.  Add the remaining ingredients and stir to incorporate fully.  Pour into the refrigerated or frozen pie shell and bake for 40-45 minutes, until a nice crust forms on top and it appears set.  A table knife should come out clean when inserted into the filling.  Allow to set up until cool enough to slice and serve with any desired toppings - vanilla bean ice cream, whipped cream, and hot fudge encouraged!  Enjoy!

Sweet Cream Biscuits and Chocolate Gravy

Most decadent breakfast ever.

As in allowing it to be a breakfast should be illegal.
Deliciously illegal...

 I wasn't born south enough of the Mason-Dixon line to have grown up with this tradition.
Now that I've discovered it, it makes me kind of sad.  Although I'm probably thinner for it.  Hm.
But I kept reading about it and decided I just had to experience it for myself.

Best and worst decision ever.
Best: it's incredible.  Rich, fluffy layers of sweet biscuit - traditionally a southern buttermilk biscuit, which I made and loved, but I then tried Dorie Greenspan's easy-to-make Sweet Cream Biscuits and got my socks knocked off - which just get better when slathered with salted butter and drenched in a chocolate concoction that nearly reaches the decadence of hot fudge.

Worst: I couldn't stop eating them!!!
Which kept me full till dinner, but still - not the sort of thing one in my profession should fill up on regularly.

Which, of course, explains why we made another batch of biscuits and paired them with the leftover gravy the next weekend.
I succumbed to the deliciousness.  Someone please stop me from making more till February?

 This may or may not have been my third one.  In one sitting.

Help.

 Sweet Cream Biscuits
Source: Baking: From My Home to Yours by Dorie Greenspan
Yield: about 8 2-1/2-inch biscuits

Ingredients:
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 tbsp baking powder
2 tsp granulated sugar
1/2 tsp salt
1 to 1-1/4 cups cold heavy cream

Directions:
Center a rack in the oven and preheat the oven to 425˚F.
Whisk together the flour, baking powder, sugar, and salt in a bowl with a fork.  Pour about 1 cup of the cream over the dry ingredients and begin to toss them together with the fork.  If necessary, add more cream a spoonful at a time until you have a nice soft dough.  Reach into the bowl with your hands and knead the dough gently just enough to bring everything together.
Turn the dough out onto a lightly floured work surface - I always use a pastry cloth.  Dust the top of the dough lightly with flour and then pat it out to about 1/2-inch thickness.  (Don't turn into me and be a total perfectionist - totally even dough is not that serious ;)  Using a floured biscuit cutter (or clean old can or the relatively sharp edge of a glass) cut out as many biscuits as you can and gently transfer them to an unlined non-stick baking sheet or a baking sheet lined with parchment paper or a silicone mat.  Try to cut them very close together to maximize output from the first go-round.  Gather together the scraps, working them as little as possible to get them to 1/2-inch thickness, and cut out as many additional biscuits as you can. 
Once all possible biscuits have been cut out and transferred to the baking sheet, bake them for 14-18 minutes, or until they're tall, puffed, and golden brown.  Transfer them to a serving biscuit and enjoy as soon as possible!
 

Chocolate Gravy
Source:  Sprinkle Bakes
Yield: about 2 cups

Ingredients:
4 tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder
2 tbsp flour
1 cup granulated sugar
1-1/2 cups whole milk
4 tbsp butter, cut into small pieces
1 tsp pure vanilla extract

Directions:
Whisk the dry ingredients together in a medium saucepan.  Pour in the milk and whisk vigorously to combine.  (There's your justification for eating this - whisking workout!  Just repeat it like a mantra until you believe it.  Or get on the treadmill or something.)  Heat the mixture over medium-high heat until it begins to bubble.  Turn the heat down to medium and stir constantly until the mixture thickens to gravy-like consistency - don't obsess too much about this part since it will thicken up a bit more as it cools slightly.  Remove the pan from the heat and add the butter and vanilla.
Allow the gravy to cool slightly, then transfer to a gravy boat.  Serve warm with biscuits and/or any other breakfast foods you want to dip in it :)  Enjoy!

Fajita Burgers

As soon as I saw these things on goodLife {eats} I was hit by an instant craving.

I had to have them.  Like, five minutes ago.
Of course, the night we were planning to make them, we got out of church late, so we couldn't.

(...just for clarification's sake, we go to an evening church service...it didn't start in the morning and go on till all hours of the afternoon.)

So I had to stave off my crazy craving for another few days.

Burger craving satiated.  Yes.

Now, quick disclaimer: I'm not the world's biggest fan of bell peppers.  I make myself eat them because I know they're good for me, and I can tolerate the taste.
So, for a burger topped with tons of peppers, it was really good!  The spiced meat mix had phenomenal flavor.  Next time I make them (because I will make them again) I'll add lettuce and salsa to the top of the burger.  Because I forgot this time.
Rough days at work make me forget to add tasty things.  They make me forget a lot of things, actually.
Sour cream and guacamole would be pretty fab on these too.

PS: Does anyone have tips for staving off child-related headaches and exhaustion?  Teaching five-year-olds this week has given me wicked cases of both...

UPDATE: These are officially guy approved!  Jon and his roommate loved them!

Fajita Burgers
Source: adapted from goodLife {eats}

Ingredients:
1 lb lean ground beef
1/4 cup salsa
1 tsp Worcestershire
1/2 tsp cumin
1 tsp chili powder
3/4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
4 slices pepper jack cheese
1 medium sweet onion, sliced into thin strips
8 oz cremini mushrooms, sliced
1-1/2 bell peppers (red, orange, yellow, or green), sliced into thin strips
Optional: guacamole, sour cream, additional salsa, lettuce for topping

Directions:
In a medium-sized bowl, combine the beef, salsa, Worcestershire, cumin, chili powder, salt, and pepper.  Using your hands or a wooden spoon (if you're like me and would really rather not get ground beef and hot chili powder under your fingernails), mix until all the ingredients are well incorporated.  Divide the mixture into four equal portions and make them into patties about 1/4 inch thick.  Set aside.
Meanwhile, prepare the onions, peppers, and mushrooms.  Heat a medium saute or cast iron pan over medium-high heat.  Add 1/2-1 tbsp canola oil.  Add the vegetables and allow to cook until they start to brown, then stir every minute or so for 5-7 minutes total, or until your desired level of tenderness is reached.
Heat the grill or grill pan to medium-high heat.  Cook the burgers 2-3 minutes per side, or until your desired done-ness is reached.  Melt the sliced pepper jack cheese over the burgers.  Serve on toasted buns with the onions, peppers, and mushrooms, and any other desired toppings.  Enjoy!

Hot Fudge Pudding Cake

UPDATE: Come join the fun at the My Baking Addiction and GoodLife Eats Holiday Recipe Swap sponsored by Scharffen Berger!  I entered this recipe in the chocolate recipe swap - there's potentially winnings!  And this would be a great dish to pull out of the oven at a family gathering :)

Get-togethers with friends are really the best occasions to bake.
I gather with people I love, laugh, and enjoy our time together.  I see the looks on their faces as they sample my latest creation.  The dessert is shared and loved by all.  And I walk away with very few leftovers to tempt me in the days to come!
It's a total win-win situation.

Friday night, I gathered with the same group of folks who helped me consume those chocolate peanut butter cupcakes I made a few weeks back.  The friend hosting the gathering offered the use of his kitchen, ingredients, and convection oven - who was I to say no?  So I looked for a recipe that would be delicious, boy food, and relatively quick and easy to throw together.  And I came up with this!

I had bookmarked this recipe from Tracy over at Sugarcrafter probably close to a year ago and for some reason never made it.  But when I found it among my bookmarks I knew it would be perfect.  Rich, chocolatey, meant to be gooey, and only required to cool for 15 minutes before serving?
SOLD.

And I wasn't the only one sold on it.
It started like this:

 Progressed to this:

And then to this:

So it's safe to say the dessert was well received.

This has officially entered my repetoire of easy last-minute desserts.  It's a fabulous, simple, crowd-pleasing pantry recipe.
Unless you don't like chocolate.  In which case, I pity you.  And...sorry.  Just eat the ice cream?

Hot Fudge Pudding Cake
Source: adapted from Sugarcrafter , originally adapted from Hershey's 

Ingredients:
1 cup all-purpose flour
1-1/4 cups granulated sugar
1/2 cup Hershey's Special Dark cocoa, divided
2 tsp baking powder
1/8 tsp salt
1/8 tsp cinnamon
1/2 cup milk
1/3 cup butter, melted
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
1/2 cup (packed) light brown sugar
1-1/4 cups hot water

Directions:
Preheat the oven to 350˚F (convect at 325˚F).
Whisk together the flour, baking powder, salt, cinnamon, half the sugar, and half the cocoa powder.  Stir in the milk, butter, and vanilla, whisking until totally smooth.  Pour into an ungreased 9-inch square baking pan.  Mix the remaining sugar and cocoa powder together with the brown sugar and sprinkle the mixture evenly over the top of the mixture in the pan.  Pour the hot water over all.  Do not stir.  (That last bit was stated emphatically.  Stirring = bad.)
Bake for 35-40 minutes (or convect for 25-30 minutes) or until almost set.  Remove from the oven, place on a cooling rack, and allow to cool for 15 minutes before serving directly from the pan - with a spoon - and topping with whipped cream or vanilla ice cream.  Enjoy!

Chicken Parmesan, the lighter way

Honestly, what I post on this blog is not a particularly accurate representation of my diet.

I eat clean the vast majority of the time, especially when I'm at school cooking for myself.  Most of my diet consists of fruits, vegetables, lean protein, and whole grains, and I make dessert very rarely.   I feel a lot better when I eat a wholesome varied diet.
That doesn't mean that I want my food to taste like it's insanely healthy.  As a result, I'm on an eternal quest to make healthy comfort food.

A total contradiction, I know, but welcome to my life.  I am, after all, an aspiring professional dancer who loves to bake.  I have to at least try to make healthy food taste like it'll clog your arteries!

One of my favorite blow-my-diet Italian dishes is Fettucine Alfredo.  Another is gnocchi in a tomato cream sauce.  Those are things that you just can't make authentic healthy versions of.  Or even authentic-tasting.
I'm sorry, but using low-fat cream cheese to thicken your alfredo sauce is wrong.  Cream cheese??  
Really??

Chicken Parmesan, however, was a bit more redeemable.

Instead of browning the breaded chicken in oil, seasoned Panko breadcrumbs are toasted to make them brown and, well, toasty before they're tossed with grated Parmigiana Reggiano to form the breading.  Panko is extra crispy, so you don't miss the frying, and the chicken is cooked entirely in the oven in about 20 minutes total.  Homemade marinara sauce and part-skim mozzarella get all warm and melty on top to finish a dish that satisfies you without weighing you down.  Serve it with a salad or a green vegetable - like grilled zucchini - and a whole-grain baguette, and you have a well-balanced, healthy, AND comforting meal!

And if you need a testament to it's status as healthy comfort food, just ask Jon - I served it to him and he didn't think it tasted "healthy" at all!  Officially guy-approved :)

Lightened-Up Chicken Parmesan
Source: adapted from Annie's Eats, originally from Cook's Illustrated, October 2006

Ingredients:
1 1/2 cups Italian-seasoned panko breadcrumbs
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese, plus extra for serving
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
salt and pepper
3 large egg whites
1 tbsp. water
vegetable cooking spray
2 large boneless, skinless chicken breasts, butterflied and cut into halves (4 pieces total)
2 cups marinara sauce, warmed
about 1/2 cup shredded part-skim mozzarella cheese
1 tbsp. minced fresh basil


Directions:
Preheat oven to 475˚F with an oven rack on the middle position.  Line a rimmed baking sheet with aluminum foil and coat the foil with vegetable cooking spray.
Toast Panko breadcrumbs in a large skillet over medium-high heat until golden brown.  Set aside to cool.
Place flour in a pie plate or on a sheet of wax paper.  Whisk together the egg whites and water in a shallow dish.  Combine cooled breadcrumbs with the grated Parmesan cheese and spread on a sheet of wax paper or a pie plate.  Season the chicken pieces with salt and pepper on both sides.  Dredge each piece in the flour, then dip in the egg whites, then cover in breadcrumbs, pressing to adhere.  Transfer the pieces to the baking sheet and place in the heated oven for 15 minutes, or until chicken is no longer pink and feels firm when pressed with a finger.  Remove the chicken from the oven.  Spoon 2 tablespoons of sauce over each piece and sprinkle with 2 tablespoons of shredded mozzarella.  Return to the oven for 5-6 more minutes, until the cheese is melted.  Sprinkle with fresh basil and serve as desired with extra sauce and Parmesan cheese.  Enjoy!

Apologies...

So... It's been about a million and a half years since I actually cooked anything.

I've been working a lot.  And I work with kids.  Most exhausting job ever.

Except for Jon's job...working outside all day doing lots of heavy lifting till all hours of the night...

Hush.  I know I'm being ridiculous.

But this whole teaching-dance-to-kids thing has been draining me of all creative inspiration and energy - I've been using it all on their choreography.  And good Lord has it been hot lately!!  So at the end of the day, I'd rather go home and order in or eat leftovers than think up an interesting new meal.

And that reminded me that I need to go to the grocery store...dangit!

Additional side note: fried spaghetti = amazing.  Hurrah for tasty leftovers.

So, here's my apology for being a bad food blogger.  Why must life interfere with...my life?

But to make up for it, here's a picture of me and Jon!

That probably doesn't make up for lack of recipe, but I think it's adorable.
And he's handsome.  I'm a lucky girl :)

AND I've been getting to sing a lot more at church.  I couldn't be more blessed to be serving Christ with my friends on the worship team.  It's truly amazing to feel His presence and see Him move in my life and the lives of others, sometimes in just minutes.  Absolutely incredible.

So, that's life.  I'll do my best to be back with another recipe soon!